


wanna play with my lightsabre

by curiouslyfic



Category: Batman (Comics), Red Hood and the Outlaws (Comics), Red Robin (Comics)
Genre: M/M, Ridiculous, Swearing, Terrible Nicknames, idiot friends, it is not jason, nerd jokes, roy harper has a big mouth, somebody's a hugger
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-12
Updated: 2015-12-12
Packaged: 2018-05-06 09:38:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,980
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5411951
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/curiouslyfic/pseuds/curiouslyfic
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Next to some of the batshit crazy crime fighting he's done, getting tickets to a movie is pretty minor. </p><p>It should be, anyway.</p>
            </blockquote>





	wanna play with my lightsabre

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Mr_Dadamy_Blake](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mr_Dadamy_Blake/gifts).



> Thanks to crazyparakiss and iamjasonssmirkingrevenge for the help. 
> 
> Not exactly your prompt, Martyjensen, but I hope it's okay. :)

Tim's a hardcore nerd and to be honest, Jason doesn't get it. The Klingon, the guild raids, the Jedi/Sith thing, it is all a fucking mystery. 

Still, Jason considers himself reasonably flexible, reasonably creative, and extremely devoted to his sex life, which is to say that he can be resourceful. 

He can research this shit. If it makes Tim happy, Jason can do a lot. 

.

Next to some of the batshit crazy crime fighting he's done, getting tickets to a movie is pretty minor. 

It should be, anyway.

. 

"Aw, Jay, I can't," Tim says, like that is a reasonable response to the question, which was not actually a yes or no. Because of course Tim’s coming to the big Star Trek marathon, how could he not be, Jason got tickets. 

"No, Tiny Tim, I don't think you heard me. I got tickets to your thing." Tim frowns at him, which Jason does not find encouraging. "Me, Mister _I'm armed and annoyed already_ , _I_ got tickets to your thing. I waited in line like an asshole. With a bunch of other assholes. Who weren't even speaking human, I swear, it was all just dopey giggling and grunts, Tim, that is not normal—" Tim's jacked up an eyebrow now, so Jason shuts up and restarts. "It is all the movies, all of them—" He stops to the do the arm motions he learned in the line. Tim's other eyebrow creeps up. Jason remembers the rest of the big pitch he got from Roy. "It's not even on release date, Timmy, it's the day before, so right when it hits midnight they can put on the new one and you can — sorry, _we_ can see it in context." 

He feels a little like he should be doing ta-da hands. 

Tim's expression hasn't changed. When it does, it falls, sort of melts into itself and resolves to something lip-bitingly sad. "That sounds awesome, Jason. Thank you. I really wish I could." 

And God, it sucks that he's so gentle. "But you can't." Jason's just...not gonna emote about this one at all, Jason is just going to repress this motherfucker forever, this is _movie tickets_ , this is not major. 

It's just, Tim's not happy lately. Tim's tired. And. Jason wanted to _make_ Tim happy, which is basically impossible, Tim's got the whole weight of the world on his tiny shoulders and he fucking sucks at delegation, and Jason really thought this might do it. 

Thinks maybe it did, until reality set in. 

Which is bullshit. They are crime-fighting superheroes, they are billionaire adoptees, they are Little Orphan Annie if she'd ever learned to kick some ass, reality is supposed to be a thing for other people. 

"I'm in Dresden that week," Tim says, wincing. "Back Sunday night, I think. Could be the Tuesday after, though, I'd honestly have to check." Then Tim's whole face lights up in that way that's going to break Jason's heart — it happens _every time_ , Tim only looks like that when he's thinking about something that makes him the saddest crayon in the box and Jason hates it, Jesus, Jason is developing a goddamned phobia of that look on Tim's face. "But hey, you bought two, you said? So you were going to go with me?" 

Jason has a flash need for violence at how _hopeful_ Tim is that his goddamned boyfriend's willing to go see a stupid movie with him. 

Tim has set that expectation bar so low, Jason trips over it constantly, has to fight the knee-jerk urge to start tracking down all the people in Tim's past who let him think he wasn't worth someone else's time. 

He's aware of the irony. 

"Yeah, Timbers, we'll go when you get back." Jason can't even exchange the tickets yet, he doesn't have a new date, but he's pretty sure the big _all the movies_ thing was a one-time deal. 

Tim's still biting his lip thoughtfully when Jason stops gritting his teeth at the day's developments. "Have fun with Roy." 

. 

"We should dress up," Roy says when Jason invites him and okay, dressing up is just not happening, Jason refuses, and he cannot dead-eye glare enough to make that clear. Then Roy starts cackling and smacks his arm and, like, crying with laughter, what the hell, Harper, and the only reason Jason doesn't rescind the offer entirely — because fuck this nonsense, all of it — is that Roy sends a pic of Jason's glare to Tim and gets a lol. 

. 

Roy cackles all the way into the theatre. Swears pretty much all the way home. Jason's tolerance for sci-fi is heavily dependent on his company and while he likes Roy just fine, Roy's pretty good at amusing himself. 

Participating in Roy's hobbies also has no actual effect on Jason's sex life, thank fuck, so Jason's less inclined to find patience when Roy gets overexcited. 

"No, fuck you, Jay, you big cocktease," Roy protests, combative, physically fighting with himself as he slinks onto Tim's couch. "We were _this close_ , you jackass, _why are we not still there_." 

"I am sitting through that once," Jason says, as clearly as he can because Roy's in a mood now, it's like dealing with an overstimulated toddler who's missed a nap. "One time, Roy. That one time is not going to be in a theatre full of strangers and _you_ , okay." 

Roy blinks at him. Breaks into a smile so wide, Jason half-expects to see Kori behind him. "Aww, Jay. _Awww_. You big softie. That is so adorable, it almost makes the cockteasing okay." 

"Get out," Jason says, snapping and pointing when Roy just bounces on the couch. "Out. Harper, I'm serious, it is like six hours past your naptime, okay, you need to go to bed so we can...never do this again." 

"Okay, Jason," Roy intones, all puffed out and oh Jesus, Jason is going to hear about this shit forever, he can tell. "I will go, but only so that you can call your man." 

Then Roy's making kissy faces at him and fake-swooning and Jason wants so much to say Roy Harper is the most ridiculous person he knows but, well, someone came to the big _all the movies_ thing dressed like the big slug, Harper's not even the most ridiculous person Jason's seen _today_. 

. 

"So how was it?" Tim asks straight away when Jason calls him. Video chat's not bad at the best of times, Jason likes being about to spot the signs of Tim getting worn down while he's travelling, but it's a lot more fun at night. 

God, Tim is pretty. Pantsless and half-buttoned, hair going ten different directions, he's the kind of fantastic Jason wants to see all the time, now and later and for as long as Tim's willing to let him stick around. 

"Jay?" Tim laughs a little. "If you're that tired, go to sleep. I appreciate the effort but all things considered, we can skip it just this once." 

That's not something Jason's willing to start. "Nah, I'm good. Caught some shut-eye later, you know? After. I'm good." 

"You are not, Jason, you are a cock-blocking freak," Roy yells from what is clearly not his fucking guestroom. 

At least Tim's eyebrows both shoot up together. "Hi Roy," Tim calls, and waves. _Waves_. It's so adorable, Jason can't stand it. "Did you like the movie?" 

Roy slinks back down the stairs and into the nest proper, comes to hover just out of Jason's reach. His tiny smirk says he knows exactly what he's doing. Jason can't even say he's surprised. 

"Wouldn't know," Roy says, winding up to complain again, and Jason says, 

"Oh, here we go," over him and Roy death-glares at him like what Jason is supposed to be looking at with pantsless Tim on the monitor is Roy Harper's face, ugh, and 

"The little missus wouldn't let me stay to see it," Roy accuses, pointing and everything, and 

"There's no need to be heteronormative about it, man, fuck," Jason deflects and 

Tim's laughing. 

"I have waited actual _years_ to see that movie, asshole, we were like twenty minutes from go time and you hauled me out of there like we were going to blow the place, you can deal with the heteronormativity this once, you dick," and Jason can't tell if Roy's actually a fan of whatever-the-hell series it was or if he's doing this just to mess with Jason. 

Either or, man. 

"You got a big mouth," Jason says, as darkly as he's got for his best friend, then looks at Tim because maybe Tim thinks he's an asshole now, maybe Roy and Tim are going to bond about the cruelty of being denied opening night tickets or whatever. It would be just like Roy to somehow cost Jason boyfriend points for this. "I mean. He's got a big mouth, you know?" 

Tim's biting down on laughter, that special level of amused he seems to save for when Roy's around. "We've met." 

" _Twenty minutes_ ," Roy repeats, and he looks forlorn, ugh. "That is a bathroom break and the end credits of the one before, Jaybird, that is relatively nothing. Why couldn't we stay?" 

"I told you, Harper, you got a big mouth," Jason grinds out finally, it has been dragged out of him by virtue of Harper trying to make him look like an ass, and there's something shrewd about the way Roy looks so victoriously smug at the admission. 

"Spoilers," Tim says. Deduces. God, Jason wants to keep him. "Roy, can I have a minute alone with Jay, please?" 

"You set him straight, Timbo," Roy agrees with a sharp nod, and Jason says, "Heteronormativity, Roy," which gets him a lifted finger as Roy disappears. 

Jason watches him leave because with Harper there are sometimes shenanigans, sometimes he skips out of bed and comes down to invade your video call just to be a dick, and when Jason's reasonably sure Roy's actually left them alone, he turns back to find Tim with this soft smile Jason really wants to kiss. 

"You really dragged him out just before it started?" Tim claps a hand over his mouth like that's going to hide the laughter but he's shaking with it and his eyes are closed, Jason wants a loop of this to get him through the bad nights. 

Jason tries to explain his seeing-it-once plan without using any unnecessary profanity or derogatory comments about the movie or its fans. It's surprisingly successful, not that he has any hope of doing it again. 

Tim's not laughing anymore but he's still covering his mouth, staring at Jason with uncommonly wide eyes. 

"I'm really hoping you like Han Solo," Jason tries, because he literally just watched this shit, he can talk about it if Tim wants. "Because, I mean, if you're more a Luke kinda guy, we might have some shit to work out, you know? He's a hugger, right? He seems like a hugger." 

Tim says, "I love you," and Jason thinks _What_ and Jason says, 

"And hey, Han's sidekick was hairy and inarticulate, too," because even when his brain shorts out unexpectedly on him, he can still work up an insult for Roy, and Tim's mouth is this sweet little O for a moment, fuck, Jason wants him here in person. 

Tim says it again. Just. "I love you," like it's true and there's nothing stopping him from saying it all he wants. "Oh my god, Roy and Chewie, that's the best thing—" and Tim's smothering himself again like he needs to hide his laughter. 

"I. Me, too," Jason says, helplessly. "I love you, too." 

Then it's out there. Kind of terrifying, even if Tim's said it first. 

"I know," Tim says through the heartbreaking softness of the saddest crayon look, then, "We should start calling Damian Ani," because Tim is also a little shit.


End file.
